The Struggle for (Quality) Blog Posts

I am constantly thinking and wanting to write, to share with you all my experiences and thoughts and feelings. I have twelve different blog posts started on here half- or almost done, just waiting to be finished and sent out into the great beyond that is the internet. But I struggle with the (almost constant) thought that what I have to say isn’t interesting enough or has already been said. I want to put quality work out into the world. Every experience is different though, and I’ve seen my life in a different way than any other person can. I just hope that someday someone will take something positive away from my words.

This is just a reminder that I am here and I want to share this life I live, this life worth talking about. I will write more. I will share more. I will not be afraid that what I have to say isn’t good enough.

Is there anything you want to know about me? Any questions or comments, or something you would like me to write about?

Feel free to leave any suggestions in the comments, or somewhere over on facebook. I would love a challenge. I even write fiction! (haha)

Eight Years Ago

Eight years ago I was in a hospital room, hooked up to two IVs. My friends and family were gathered in the waiting room, where they would wait for hours and hours for the same bad news they had already received the day before.

Eight years ago instead of fetal monitoring devices strapped to my thirty-seven week basketball of a belly, underneath that horrible teal and white stretchy band, a thin tube was delivering pain medication to my body because adding physical pain to the emotional hell would just be adding insult to injury.

Eight years ago I mostly cried, but sometimes I smiled.

Eight years ago hated everything, but I loved you.

Eight years ago I just wanted it to be over, but I never really wanted it to end.

Eight years ago I should have been bringing a beautiful, screaming baby into this world who I had endless plans and hopes and dreams for, but you came here as a whisper of everything I have ever wanted and left without so much of a breath of fresh air.

Eight years ago I went through all of the stages of birth through induction. Seven am: check in. Eight am: induction. Nine am: contractions. Noon: water broken. Three thirty pm: push,



Eight years ago at four oh four in the afternoon you were six pounds and twelve ounces. You were nineteen and one quarter of an inch long. You had soft, strawberry blonde curls atop your head. You were perfect in every way. But you were born sleeping.

Eight years ago, I held you in my heavy and broken arms for just eighteen hours. I kissed your head for the first and last time in less than one day. I held your hand in mine and wept for everything you could have been and everything we would never be or do or say.

For two-thousand and ninety two days I have longed for you and loved you and wondered what you could love to do and who you would be today.

(Click here to read Tristan’s Story)

Happy Eighth Birthday, Little Bear. I miss you and love you every day.

It’s Almost My Birthday!

As my 26th year here on this Earth comes to an end, I realize how bittersweet moving on to year 27 will be. 2016 held so many incredible memories and an exponential amount of growth for me and I am so thankful to have gone through this past year and approach my birthday knowing that I am a better, more sane, and more spiritual person than I was.

In the year of 2016 I accomplished so many things that I am so proud of myself for. I married the love of my life, gained a smart and kind and loving stepson, I got a job I love, I connected with my spirituality, I (finally) got a certification in my chosen career path, and I made some friends for life. Never did I think I would make it to this wonderful place in my life, and I am so excited to build on it this year. In 2017 I plan to kick my diabetes’ ass, quit smoking cigarettes, find a job as a Web Developer, to expand my farm, spend more time reading and writing, and to begin preparing my body to have a baby.

You truly can do just about anything you set your mind to. I believed I could achieve some of my dreams, despite the struggle it has been to get here, and here I am more motivated than ever to be the boss of my life. If I can do it, so can you.

A Little Reminder (You Can Do It)

Far too frequently I forget all that I am capable of and all that I have accomplished so far in this life. It’s very easy to get sucked into the negative side of life (misery does love company, after all), but if you can learn to be optimistic and to remember all the amazing things you can do life will get a little easier.

Whatever it is that you might be struggling with, please know that you can accomplish this task, no matter how difficult it may seem. You can go the distance, look how far you have already come.

How to Be a Magical Wife

As my Dear Husband’s biggest fan and supporter, I try to make his life the best it can possibly be, and using the magick within me (and that which resides in all of you) can make all of your efforts that much easier and greater. Life can be difficult, but with a few extra minutes and a little bit of intent, you can add a lot of enchantment to your marriage.

Everyday Magick to Keep Your Husband Enchanted: 

  1. Make his lunch before he leaves for work and infuse it with magick to give him the extra energy, positivity, and love to get him through his day
  2. Enchant the soap in the shower to cleanse and purify every time it’s used. The friction of using it activates the enchantment
  3. Ask your Tarot cards how you can be the best spouse possible
  4.  Use essential oils or herbs from your apothecary to create a topical potion to enhance love making
  5. If he has an over abundance of negative energy, hold his hands to absorb some of it and then release it in whichever way you prefer (e.g. a shower, incense burning, grounding, etc.)
  6. Pick your favorite lipstick/chapstick to enchant with positive energy and put it on before kissing him

Now go forth a fill your home and your marriage with love, positivity, and magick.


This is not intended to interfere with free will. These strategies
will only work if you are already in a happy marriage (or relationship).
Magick only properly works when there is
active intention and effort behind it.


“Officially” Exiting the Broom Closet

To be completely honest with you, I have no idea what you really know about me. You may get sporadic emails that I have published a new blog, you might follow my Facebook page Just Blonde: Not Dumb, where the posts are relatively frequent, or maybe you’re an actual friend… But do you know that I am an incredibly spiritual person? I am even quite fond of the label Witch.


My personal belief is a witch is simply a person who has learned, through trial and error, how to harness the energy that is already constantly surrounding them. Disclaimer: Like many have said before, real witchcraft is not what you see in the Hollywood movies; it is knowing that you have an inherent ability to help the world form into a (hopefully) better place by using the magick (energy manipulation) every one of us are given.

All that being said, I hereby renounce any closeteness I have had towards my magical self. I do not seek to preach or push my beliefs on others, but to instead share a journey down a path that continually brings me an incredible amount of happiness and validation as I work my way through this puzzle we call life.

It is a little nerve-wracking doing this, because I have heard of so many instances where people get bashing for being any form of Pagan, being called a Satan worshiper and an evil person who is going to Hell, but I want to remind you if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. I will not be offended because you do not want to hear or learn about the way I view the world, but please don’t bring your negativity to my doorstep because it is not welcome and will be rejected.

As for the rest of you… Witchcraft sounds a little enticing, huh?

Merry Meet, Merry Part,
Blessed Be, You’re in my heart.


These Days…

Been very busy, but haven’t forgotten about you! I work part time, run a household and a (growing) homestead with my husband, and go to school for two classes a semester… In between these activities I have found myself brainstorming and writing out blog drafts for some posts I’m very excited about.

It’s quite the variety of weather here in New Hampshire, been in the 40s this past weekend, and we are expecting a mixed precipitation Nor’easter tomorrow or Tuesday. I’m certain the stores are filled with people buying water, haha! I am certainly looking forward to Spring and warmer weather…

I will pick a day to begin posting blogs, maybe once a week to begin with… Hoping you’ll be around to watch it all come out.